A FLORIST’S worth of flowers, a pile of Pandora and too many bottles of fizz to count were what awaited Hazel Dutton inside Uppermill’s Civic Hall.
And after a whopping 30 years as Saddleworth Parish Council’s most dedicated clerk, it was beyond well-deserved.
Finally retiring at the age of 79, Friday, July 17 was an emotional day for the lady of the hour – and equally so for the dozens of people who arranged a party to see her off.
“It’s so nice to see everybody here,” she told the Saddleworth Independent. “The people I’ve worked with when I first started, the people I’ve worked with since, and current employees. I’ve made so many friends.
“I’m quite touched, really. We’ve had so much fun. It doesn’t feel like 30 years at all, it’s just flown past.”
Having started at the council the year England hosted the European football championships, and now departing just days after they reached the World Cup semi-finals, it is safe to say it has been a hectic three decades for Hazel.
From the “idiots who come into the office from time to time,” to “the one fella who came in waving a stick”, there has been no shortage of interesting visitors over the years – not least, the man who asked if he could fit a cow up the stairs of Civic Hall.
“I thought, ‘Somebody must be filming this,’” Hazel recalled, “And I started laughing! This mental picture went through my mind of five fellas trying to get a cow – a live cow – up to the ballroom.
“So I said, ‘I’m very sorry, but this is the Parish Council – it will have to go to committee!’
“I turned up to the Assets Committee, and I said, ‘Excuse me, Madam Chairman, I do have one item of other business – we’ve had an inquiry from someone who wanted to bring a cow into the ballroom’.
“The old committee just started looking at each other. To this day, I still think it was a wind-up.”
The so-called wind-up, she would later discover, had been for an advert for John Smith’s beer, apparently involving legendary comic Steve Coogan.
It never materialised in Saddleworth in the end and she said: “The committee must have thought I’d completely lost the plot.
“That’s the beauty of this job. You don’t know what you’re going to walk into each day.”
From the typewriters of 1996 to the word processors of today, there has been no-one prouder of all Hazel’s achievements than her fellow colleagues.
“What can I say about our Hazel?” said fellow clerk Karen Allott.
“She’s been an inspiration and a role model to us all, and I can only hope that whoever we get to replace her is as loyal and hardworking as she has been for us.
“Hazel welcomed me in a lovely, warm and motherly fashion and looked after me, advised me, and made sure I didn’t make any stupid, silly mistakes, and I will always appreciate her for that.
“No matter how I try, I will never be able to replicate the wealth and experience and knowledge that Hazel has after 30 years here.
“We will really struggle without you, Hazel. I mean, who’s going to change the toner of the photocopier?”
Only five years ago, Hazel said she had no plans to retire any time soon, but even as she switches off the computer for the final time, the thought of settling down is still a long way off.
“Well I’m not going to be sitting here watching reruns of Midsummer Murders,” she insisted. “No. I’m not having that at all.
“I’ve always worked. I’m going to have to do voluntary work or something, just to get out. I’ve always been involved in brass bands, so something like that.
“I shall really, really miss it, but I’ll have to watch myself before I turn up again on Monday morning going, ‘I haven’t got a key, why can’t I get in? I’m supposed to be here!'”
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