Saddleworth Chatter: A few puzzles

Saddleworth Chatter by GH

I HAVE been pondering over a few things I cannot quite understand so I wonder if any of our bright readers can throw some light on the following:

Why banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Why we leave cars worth thousands of pounds in our driveways and put our useless junk in the garage.

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don’t you ever see the headline ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?

Why is ‘abbreviated’ such a long word?

Why doctors call what they do ‘practice’?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavouring, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn’t there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?


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